Dead & Deadbeat Dad's Day


I think it was about 8 years ago that we began to celebrate this new holiday. Earlier in the day, Colin and I stood on the doorstep of his Dad, or at least that was his title at the time, hopeful he would answer. We had gift in hand, ready to wish him a happy day, despite not having seen him in many, many months. Though both cars were in the driveway, the lights were on indoors, and someone was clearly looking back at us through the peephole, the door didn't open. We knocked on it for a long time.

It was rather depressing.

Later, we decided to call Joe and go get Mongolian food. Joe's father had died in 2001, the exact same day my Grandfather died. After 2 classes together in college, you could say this event really cemented our friendship. Then he introduced me to his friend Colin, then we all lived together off and on, then he was the Best Man at our wedding, and even though he's lived in Dallas for a year now, he's still one of the best friends we've ever had. By far. He's celebrating Dead & Deadbeat Dad's Day in Texas this year, with his fellows.

It became a tradition for those of us who didn't have any obvious plans on Father's Day. We banded together, recognizing that we had each other, and all-you-can-eat Mongolian buffet. It was one of our favorite celebrations all year.

I've never met my father. Or, apparently I did once when I was 2, but... I don't remember it either way. I never felt a lack on Father's Day in my life until my Grandpa passed away. My Grandpa was the only father I'd ever known.

Today, with Joe gone to Dallas, we decided to eat Mongolian food with our Mom's, my grandma, and Colin's grandfather.  I think it's fitting.

With that, I want to wish a Happy Father's Day to our grandparents, who were constant figures in our upbringings when others were not. To the small handful of men, like Chuck S., and John B., who showed us what real men are like, who have always answered the phone when we called, and who were always there to counsel and support us when we asked, despite having families and lives of their own. And, most importantly to our Mom's, who performed double-duty as parents when they weren't given a choice either. It wasn't easy or fun for them to be both mother and father to us, but they proved that some parents stick around, love their children, and will always, always be our parents regardless of what else is going on, or whatever excuse another might be inclined to make. They never made a choice to not be parents, and for that we honor them.

4 comments:

Jen and Bern said...

Great post! Love how you celebrate it.

shayla said...

Thanks, Jen. :o)

Smashgirl said...

*wiping tears* very touching :)

shayla said...

Thank you... :o)